• I am not in a food coma - though that would be preferable to my current condition.
• I did not get buried under the abnormal snow that hit the Puget Sound region, nor was I frozen solid as I attempted to take out my garbage in a Fargoesque snowstorm.
• I was not hit by a skidding car, driven by an overagitated, underprepared Pacific Coast driver who was trying to get from Point A to Point B in the aforementioned snowstorm without benefit of things like snow chains or smart driving speeds or - after the first few slow-motion mid-street automobile pirouettes - a clean pair of pants.

No, the reality is more quotidian, more irritating, but rather well timed. The weather turned, and I got what felt like a cold. Then yesterday I awoke after a nap to find I'd become on giant ache.

I am ill. (I'd say "I'm sick", but I'm always sick, and that's why you folks love me. No, this time I must choose the more semantically precise word.) I ache, I fall asleep at the drop of a hat, and I have no energy. And to top it all off, I can't find my danged Source Naturals Wellness Formula (ie, horsepills.) Those things will kick just about anything to the curb in nothing flat...and I can't find my bottle. I'm positive I had some, I remember going to buy some early last fall the same time I bought the tea tree oil...and when my parents were visiting, we went and got my mom another bottle, which she took home with her.

So yesterday, I curled up on the sofa and slept while intermittently waking up to watch whatever episode of House Hunters International happened to be on, occasionally drinking a mug of cider or cocoa, or just some ice water. I did not roast the potatoes I'd bought, nor did I fix the green salad I'd planned to, nor did I eat the pumpkin pie I'd purchased. Today I most emphatically did not wake up at 3am to be at any Black Friday sales. (Nor did I bother getting dressed to go to any when I finally did wake up.) I need to do laundry, but I think I'll take another lazy day and do laundry tomorrow. Or possibly Sunday. Or possibly some time next weekend, because I have enough warm socks and warm pants and everything else (except space in the hamper) to last me another week-plus.

I ache, and my nose is drippy, and I'm tired. I'm bundled up in my grey sweatpants, navy crewneck sweatshirt, and fuzzy blue socks that look like I skinned a Muppet. My nails still have faint greenish cast from removing the last polish I was wearing (the most exertion I had yesterday was removing said nail polish.) I am so very glad I wrote all these posts ahead of time...and there's still a whole bunch more in the queue, praise to my foresight.

I'll probably be on Twitter occasionally this weekend, but then again...possibly not. (EDIT: I was on the web long enough to write this post...and Caitlin from Shiro Cosmetics craftily and strategically posted about her Black Friday sale. I failed my self-control roll against Sudden Sale Announcements.)

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